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“Making proper choices a serious business”- 12 July 2015.

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Written by Rita Aggarwal
Thursday, 30 July 2015 18:55

R.A

Q. I'm final year student in MA in Eng literature. However I left it in the middle due to some reason. I'm a nature & animal lover and always wanted to make career in it. I planned to give UPSC for IFS but realized that I don't have required qualification for it. Now I'm mighty confused as I searched and searched but couldn't find any course or job in Nagpur related to my interest. My parents are asking me to continue M.A lit. But I don't want to. Please can you suggest me any path that involves my passion in animals & nature in Nagpur as my
parents won't let me go anywhere else? I would love to work in any NGO if you could suggest any trustworthy organization. Also any course that would help me get into NGOs. I want to do something good for others. I appreciate your help greatly.

Ans.  You don’t require any specific course to get into an NGOs. It actually is voluntary work and anyone interested can join. The NGO in Nagpur I can think of are  –Animal welfare organization and SPCA Borgaon, Nagpur. There is the Ujjwal Gaurakshan Trust. You could search further online. Another option and a better one could be to complete your masters programme and join the NGO on a part time basis.

S.M

Q. I'm 22 years old resident of Nagpur. I always wanted to be a doctor as science subject was my strong particularly Biology but my father put me in engineering field. Now this year I completed my engineering course. Even today I have the same love & interest for biology. So basically my question to you is that is there any hope that I can still do any course in medical field now? Not necessarily to be a doctor but any course related to medical field because I believe that I can do much better progress in medical than in engineering. Can I make my career possible in medical profession? Please suggest.

Ans. You could do a post graduate degree in Biomedical engineering or Medical Technology from a college in Maharashtra or any other state in India. There are many colleges offering this course, even IIT’s offer it I think. Padmashree Dr. DY Patil University - Dept of Biotechnology and Bioinformatics, Navi Mumbai(Maharashtra), and College of Engineering Pune also offer it. You could search for them online.

K.M

Q. I have cleared my 12 th in science I got 68%. Now I am very confused regarding my career. My parents want me to do engineering but my interest is in sketching. I just love doing that and according to my parents sketching has no future. They want me to do engineering and top in that so that I can work in big companies and earn well. They don’t want me to go out of station for studies but I want go. Please provide a feed back. Is there any career regarding sketching and related courses?

Ans.  Sketching is one part of art and design courses. I do not know if there is a full fledged course in it. It is taught in fine arts and forms a part of many courses. Are you interested in pure art career or a science and art combination? There are careers like architecture which is a combination of artistic talent as well as a scientific reasoning. There are art courses like commercial art, fine art, graphic designing, etc. A session of career guidance and counselling will help you decide properly. An aptitude test will give us your ability profile. That is the best way to take a decision which will affect your life and future. It needs to be thought out systematically.

M.B

Q. I am in second year engineering. I was failing in every exam since first year and now I am not promoted to third year. I am confused about what should I do now? Should I continue or should I opt for another course? Please suggest me as soon as possible

Ans. It is necessary that you first get your aptitude test done to check whether you are actually fit for engineering or not. Secondly it is important to know your area of interest and your personality factors. There is no point in failing like this- it is bad for your mental health. You should work for success and that comes only when you make the right choice.

 

“Habits do not die overnight”- 5 July 2015.

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Written by Rita Aggarwal
Thursday, 30 July 2015 18:54

ABC.

Q. I am pursuing mechanical engineering course and now I am in 3 year. Mam I am really confused mam. I felt in love with a guy and I love him very much but when my parents came to know then we were separated due to our caste difference. My mom is single parent and for her until I have done everything right from engineering to study engineering in my home town, for her I left my dream to do my career in dance. Mam I am a classical dancer and I want to do my career in dance but my mom want to me to do engineering so for her I know she is alone, she has done many things for me and my brother, I don't want to hurt her but I love that guy and he also love me a lot and now he is going for merchant navy but my mom has warned me that if I went to that guy than she will leave me. I know she cares for me, she thinks if I am in relation than my academic performance will be lower but I am topper in my class every time. Mam please help me what should I do. I am very confused and frustrated. My mom is class 1 officer as well as P.hd. I don't know at this century she really thinks of caste n all. Mam plzz help me. I am really depressed.

Ans. Since you are already in third year engineering you will be completing the degree in another year. You can always pursue dance in a few years from now. Perhaps your mother has struggled a lot and feels that a steady income is important and dance has no guarantee of good money unless you become someone and make a name for yourself. Once you are independent and self- supporting, you can go back to dance. Meanwhile keep practicing it as much as you can as a hobby. Actually caste is no bar for marriage in today’s world. But your mother has her own reasons. You should respect her and understand her concerns. Let some time pass till both of you settle down. If the feelings last that long you will be in a position to take your own decisions and your mother might agree too as you would become independent and mature by then.

S.A

Q. I love a person badly, was in a relationship with him for over a year. He loved me back. But my insecurity made him frustrated. And, now suddenly he is ignoring me. He abused my parents and grandparents. But still I love him. Also, he has made one thing very clear, that he won't let me go for a job after marriage. I am against this. What should I do?

Ans. You should forget him as he has two clearl negative points. One is that he abused your parents and grandparents and you should not take that lightly. He will abuse you too tomorrow as that may be his habit. Habits do not die overnight and tend to persist for long times unless worked on seriously. Secondly he will not allow you to work and you would like to work anyway. This should not be acceptable to you at all. The feelings of love and attachment are one thing and getting married to him is another thing. It actually reveals his nature which is disrespecting towards people and especially women. He will make a terrible husband for you. He may be good for someone else who may share his ideas and thoughts but not for you. There is a limit to what you can compromise on.

S.D

Q. I am 19 years old, a resident of Nagpur. I always wanted to be in the Hotel industry serving the company at the managerial levels in my future. Mam I want your suggestions and advice on the same as to which way I should take off to achieve it. Whatever I have got to know from my elders and friends about the Hotel management stream is that there are two choices for me to do the same. Either I can take admission in BBA now and pursue my MBA in HM after that or I can directly go for the 3 or 4 years Degree course in HM. I want to know the scope and future career prospects in both the courses, also I want to know that are there any good colleges & institutions in Nagpur for the same which could give me a better career opportunity in India and abroad

Ans. The degree course after 12 Std would be a better idea The government institutes of hotel management are the best and provide good training. Campus placements are also good there. Mumbai, Aurangabad is well known ones. Further training in special areas can be taken abroad after graduation.

“Follow your passion”- 28 June 2015.

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Written by Rita Aggarwal
Thursday, 30 July 2015 18:52

A.T

Q. I am a 24 years old BE graduate and “visharad” in "Indian Classical Music" as a vocalist. I did engineering at the insistence of my parents, though I was unwilling to pursue this course as it was affecting my music practice for which I was committed and I was rather interested in going for classical music. Still today I am doing preparations for various competitive exams just to appease my father's expectations but unable to put my heart into it due to my inclination and intense love towards music and somewhere I feel my father wants to see me as an officer as well for fear of receiving societal sarcastic remarks, at the same time I also want to fulfil his expectations but it seems to be very much hard to me as I find myself in music all the time, as a result of which I am unable to put in great efforts in either fields. On the contrary I want to devote myself to music for my entire life. What should I do in this situation? Please help me get out of it. I need your precious guidance.

Ans. It’s wonderful to know that you are passionate about music. Most people are not fortunate enough to know what they love doing. It’s a gift to you to know your dream and that you want to pursue it. Success and excellence lies in precisely this state of being. Since you are already a ‘Visharad’ in music and have also surprisingly done a degree in engineering at the insistence of parents I suggest you should feel free to pursue whole heartedly your passion of music. You should plan your career well in the field of music by setting clearly your short term and long term goals and get going with it. Beating around the bush would not help at all. You should just go for it. All the best.

K.M

Q. I have studied till 10th here in Nagpur and I have completed my 12th from Andhra and scored 93.7% in the boards. I have appeared for JEE mains and didn't get qualified. I got 61 marks in it. I belong to OC category I want to do CSE. I like CSE branch the most. Should I take a year drop and attempt jee mains in 2016 or should I join an engineering college now? And please suggest if my choice about the engineering branch is right or not. Waiting for your reply.

Ans. It is advisable to move ahead by seeking an admission in a college rather than spending another year repeating the whole exercise. Computer is a great branch if only you are suited for it. There is a particular aptitude that is needed for programming and if you have that it becomes easy for you. Be sure of that before you take the branch.

M.A

Q. I am a 22 age guy I have completed my graduation from this year. During the graduation I am very stressed and no one close to me. But now I feel relax and preparing for civil exam. I want to socially be with people. So give suggestion to makes friends.

Ans. It is good to have social skills and you will need loads of it if you get selected in the civil exams. It can be learnt through training. If you are serious about it you could seek an appointment with me and we could chalk out a programme for you. It is a systematic training module which you would enjoy and be successful in developing the right kind of skills that you need. To begin with, start taking the initiative in greeting people and asking them simple questions about their welfare. Learn to ask them simple questions and try to make simple comments too. The next step could be done in the training sessions.

A.D

Q. I have passed 12 std last year with 76% marks. I took a drop to prepare for medical but am not sure if I will be able to make it or not. So I want to pursue my career in psychology if not medical. Can you please guide me about career in psychology the courses regarding it.

Ans. The first requirement is a graduation with one of the subjects as psychology. If you can get an Honours degree in Psychology it will be good for you. Then do a post graduation in Psychology and then after that you would need to specialise with an M.Phil in Clinical psychology. Please come for a session to understand the exact details. It is difficult to put out all the details here.

 

“Open the communication channels”- 22 June 2015.

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Written by Rita Aggarwal
Thursday, 30 July 2015 18:49

A.V

Q. I have cleared  my hotel  management  entrance  exam  with a good  rank, but my financial  situation  does  not  allow  me  to  go for  the  course. I am planning  to  do law from Nagpur as it is reasonable, please help me  out with  this confusion, I even  tried  loans  and  scholarship  but it is not  possible. I even enjoy studying  law subjects please help.

Ans. Sure- go ahead and do law by all means since you can afford it and you like it too. Where is the confusion? Taking loan is one option for the other course of hotel management that you mention but you should have a repayment plan as well. With a degree in law you could proceed with a post graduate degree in business management and get into a hotel in the managerial capacity. Change of careers is possible and people are doing it all the time. Sometimes it is likely that you would want to continue with law itself if you develop a great liking to it. So go ahead and do law.

N.C

Q. A friend of mine is in a lot of problem. We are preparing for JEE and are currently in class 12. She is extremely well in studies in fact she is our institute's topper but of lately she has been too stressed with her mother. Actually our schedule at the institute is too long it starts 6:30 in morning till 3:30 or at times 5:00 pm by the time we reach back home we are too tired for anything she drowses and sleeps for which her mother keeps shouting too much at her also my friend believes even if she doesn't take admission in an English tuition she can manage at it herself also we don't have the time for another tuition class I suggested that you explain it to your mother but she told me that she is not ready to listen about anything. I cannot see her in so much pain please suggest something. Waiting for your reply.

Ans. It would be worth listening to the mother one day patiently to know her reservations and her grievances. She may have come to know about your friendship and that may be troubling her? We do not know the exact reason why her mother is misbehaving. We need to find that out first. Please tell her to have a dialogue with her mother and to first listen to her patiently. After that she should try explaining to her mother her viewpoint. Most mothers will understand the priorities and also the compulsions of studies as well as the challenges that students undergo. She should ask her mother to help her fix her schedules under the present circumstances. That will help both the daughter and her mother communicate their difficulties. That is the main thing -to open the communication channel.

S.K

Q. I was working as deputy manager in a bank. There I got into relationship with my colleague. Later she got married 2 years ago and got transferred. But we were always in contact. After some time her spouse discovered our relation. Still she contacts me from her office. Now she is ignoring me too much and I can't let her memories off from my mind.
I live alone and get depressed frequently. Thoughts of blackmailing her to meet me, which is completely wrong, comes to my mind. Various negative thoughts flood my mind. I cannot focus on anything. I am all messed up and nervousness is affecting me considerably.
Please help me. Waiting for your response.

Ans. Now that she is married it would be appropriate for you to leave her alone and allow her to settle in with her husband. You should not think selfishly but think for her welfare. If you love and want her to be happy then you should leave her alone and find your happiness elsewhere. You could find another partner or find a hobby which interests you deeply. Find a creative goal for yourself. You could also explore exercising or learning a sport. What about doing social work and helping the needy. There are many options in life to make us meaningfully engaged. Romantic love is also important but now it’s too late with this friend. If you loved her so much wonder you did not marry her first? Do not be selfish but be good to her. She is trying to adjust and be faithful to her marital commitment and she is doing the best thing for herself. You too must find the best possible option for your life.

 

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